Obama’s Greatest Energy Innovation

The latest innovation from Government Motors is a design adapted from work by that world renowned innovator, Barack Obama.  The Energy Department has provided funding to G.M. in the amount of $785 Billion for start up and production.  The first factory will be located near Washington D.C. because of its proximity to the source of more shit than any other place on the planet.

As you can see, its a three-wheel motorcycle powered by human waste. According to sources in the White House, the bike runs on biogas, converted from feces that is harvested directly from the driver — who sits on the bike’s toilet-styled seat.

It is a hybrid however, because even in Washington D.C. the supply of shit is not infinite.  So there is a small flex fuel gas engine with a dual carburator that can burn methane hydrogen, and conventional liquid gasoline.

Michelle Obama will be the official spokeswoman for this exciting new vehicle and will take the prototype on a cross country promotional tour (although it will be refitted with a larger seat to accommodate Mrs. Obama).

She will be accompanied by her usual entourage of support staff, including her costume consultants, hairdressers, shoe consultants, color and design coordinators, beautician, baker, and friends and relatives.  It is estimated that the cost of her trip will be $167 million, a paltry sum when compared to the enormous economic and environmental benefits that the vehicle will bring to the planet.

The new vehicle, originally dubbed the “Personal Methane Production Transportation Unit” will be available beginning in October, 2012, just in time for the election.  The vehicle will have a retail price of just $47,550, but will be offered with a tax credit of $25,000 per vehicle to encourage early purchasers.

Stay posted for the latest energy innovations from Barack Obama, including his newly designed perpetual motion machine.

When recently questioned about this astounding achievement Mr. Obama read the following from his teleprompter.

“I, I, I, I, I, I, I, think that this er, um, er, ah, is my greatest, um, er, I, um, achievement.  It would have been available earlier except for George Bush tried to stop it.”

Is that a giant roll of toilet paper on top?


About vortextual

so much to say, so little time
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